(Previously a wine color) |
I needed something different.
Even with huge life change right around the corner and a new house in the mix of things, I still needed something to change right now. Especially since I feel like myself again. I just came out of a haze that has been the last few weeks, no thanks to the medication I was on, and can breathe. We decided to pause our treatments for a while- even perhaps until after our move to Rochester. While the last few bits of chemicals were working their way out of my body I reached the epitome of all craziness. Hysterical sobbing became my nightly ritual and by the third night I knew I wasn't going to swallow that crazy pill ever again. Ever.
(Previously yellow walls) |
I don't understand why these cysts keep recurring, and my normal tendency is to examine and analyze what they mean- what's God trying to tell me, what do I need to be doing differently- the whole lot. A friend asked me recently, "Tiffany, are you the type of person that analyzes everything or is a cyst sometimes just a cyst?"
Perhaps it's a literal "bump" in the road? An opportunity to rest instead of get worked up into the stressful hype that is infertility treatments? I needed this break- even though I fought against it for the first few weeks. I was ready to be done with it all, even if Lee wasn't. For the first time in 10 years we found ourselves in flip-flopped positions. But it wasn't long into our conversation that Lee spoke some kick-me-in-the-butt truth into my life.